


Even the smartest is a fool when in love

by Reginacorn



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Barebacking, Cunnilingus, F/M, Fluff, Highschool AU, Lovestruck!Armin, M/M, Multi, Oral Sex, Rimming, Threesome - F/M/M, conflicted feelings, mastrubation, somewhat angsty
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-28
Updated: 2016-08-25
Packaged: 2018-01-17 08:03:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 14,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1380082
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reginacorn/pseuds/Reginacorn
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Armin Arlet is in love. Unfortunately for him, it seems two people simultaneously caught his affections. And he dosent want to give either of them up. Or let them down. Or run around and desert them</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. So you're in love?

**Author's Note:**

> So, this is my first Aot fic (that I actually finished and posted a chapter for) and I'm super excited! If you guys have any feedback/critiques I'm happy to hear them! Comment on the work and I will listen to your advice! Thank you for reading!

Every day it felt like my love for them was growing stronger. The swelling in my heart felt like it would never recede, I was the Grinch after he returned the stolen presents. They made me the happiest I had ever felt.

I had this constant urge to kiss them, inciting me to believe that my feelings were highly passionate, if not less than platonic. But the problem I was afforded with -the problem I still am afforded with- is that I love both of them. I love them so much. They’re my family; they were from the moment they took me under their wings on the playground I was often bullied on. They were strong, so much stronger than I ever was. And it only furthered my love for them, the passionate and strong-willed people that they are.

Furthermore, they were (and are) beautiful, so much so it made my heart ache sometimes just to picture their faces. I am love struck, a teenager with a less- than- stereotypical fixation.

\-----

To be in love with two people at once.

It isn’t more confusing, nor is it clearer. It’s just love, plain and simple. Eren, Mikasa, and I have always been a group; I couldn’t imagine it any other way. Honestly, I don’t want to imagine it any other way. The problem is that this is weird; most high school kids would react to my feelings with repulsion.

I really don’t want to repulse the two of them, and most importantly, I don’t want to drive them away from me. So what do I do? I bottle my feelings up; I keep them a secret for years.

You see, I’ve known I love them for a very long time now. I’ll admit, I’ve always been able to analyze my feelings competently, and to use gathered information to properly judge them. When we were children on the playground my feelings for them were love. They were my knights in shining armor; I believed that my love was something typical to feel for your friends. But then, as I grew up, I was exposed to love stories. I absorbed the stories in books and movies and plays that perfectly described my feelings for them, but never fit the scenario.

When I first started reading and watching the tales at six, they would have only fit my situation if I was in love with Mikasa alone. So I tried for a while to imagine what it would be like without Eren.

I hated the very thought of leaving him behind, and could never fully imagine the scenario. So I stopped trying.

As time wore on, I delved deeper into different genres and more obscure titles, and soon discovered that you can fall in love with someone who is the same sex as you. Honestly, I already knew this, but I guess it gave my feelings some sort of validation.

However, I had yet to see something telling me it was okay to love them both at once. All I saw were love triangles and adultery, both of which told me I had to choose. I wanted it to be the same as it always was though; I didn’t want to choose between them. I wanted it to be the same, but different. I wanted it to be the three of us, but all in love, like the normal couples on T.V. the white heterosexual couples you see every day. But there was nothing like that, nothing to assure me.

Of course I knew a polyamorous relationship was possible, but I was only nine at this point, and until my exposure to one of my first more “mature” movies when I was on the brink of turning ten, I was in the dark.

I don’t remember what the movie was called, all I know is I wasn’t supposed to watch it. It was a French film, with English subtitles, but even if the subtitles weren’t there I would have gotten the only message I needed loud and clear. My feelings weren’t weird, loving two people was okay. Now all that was left was to convince my friends of that.

However, I am not brave. I wouldn’t dare to do such a thing. And so here I am, on movie night, Friday, at ten thirty with my best friends by my side and a dull ache in my chest.

All of the lights in Eren and Mikasa’s house are off and the screen glows blindingly bright. I am sitting in between the two, my legs curled up underneath myself and my arms linked with theirs. My head is resting on Mikasa’s shoulder and she is stroking my hair absentmindedly. We are watching a romance-y action movie, something with a love triangle, as usual.

I speak up over the sound of the character lamenting her decision on the screen.

“I hate love triangles. I mean, really, there is a simple solution to this dilemma that this girl isn’t even considering!”

Eren turns to me as Mikasa begins to soothingly stroke my hair again. “What are you talking about? I don’t see a solution man, just her being stupid by not turning them both down. They’re assholes and she don’t need a man like that.” 

“You mean she doesn’t need a man like that?”

I cut him off as he opens his mouth to retort. “Your terrible grammar aside, she loves them both, and love doesn’t exactly make much way for reason.”

Believe me, I know everything about that.

“Anyways, my great solution is dating them both. Honestly, why choose when you can compromise?” 

He feigns a gasp with a look of mocking shock on his face, and I flinch slightly, awaiting his reaction.

“I can’t believe that our goody- two- shoes Armin would suggest adultery! How scandalous!”

I stare at him in exasperation for a bit before opening my mouth to speak.

“That isn’t what I meant.”

“Oh?” He crosses his arms. “Then what do you mean, Armin? Because I’m drawing a blank.”

“Eren.” Mikasa interjects “I think Armin is trying to say that all three of them would be in a polyamorous relationship.”

“Thank you Mikasa.” I smile over at her gratuitously and she smiles back, bringing her hand to rest on my shoulder and gripping it warmly.

“What does polyamorous mean?”

I turn back in Eren’s direction and sigh “It means more than two people, now let’s watch the movie, I think she finished her angsty rant.”

During our argument my head had shifted from its comfortable position on Mikasa’s shoulder and my drowsy fixation with the screen had snapped. But Mikasa’s arm is still resting around my shoulder, and Eren’s foot is lightly nudging my leg.

In moments like these I realize again and again that I could exist like this forever, comfortably nestled between the two people I love. The two people I am in love with.

Its moments like these when I realize that revealing my love for them could ruin everything.

Its moments like these when I realize that I am stuck.

Its moments like these when I feel incredibly forlorn.

However, I live for moments like this, when Mikasa gently brings my head back to rest on her shoulder. When Eren notices and indignantly brings his to rest on mine. When a love interest dies and Eren grips my wrist angrily, uttering his grievances at having the one he was rooting for die. When Mikasa notices the legitimacy of my disheartened state, my already meager hopes of polyamory crushed, and begins to stroke my hair again.

I love them, and it hurts so goddamn much.

So together, we watch the heroine continue on her path to right the world. I wish that I could be as brave as the girl on the screen as I watch her slay monsters, and much to the approval of Eren, reject the remaining love interest. But I’m not, so I can just drown in my own cowardice for a bit like the fool I am.

Eren shifts from his position on my shoulder as the credits begin to roll. The heroine didn’t choose either guy. Wow. Eren was right for once in his life. Well, judging by the smug smile on his face as he clicks the T.V. off, he is fully aware of that.

“So.”

I groan and turn to face the smug bastard.

“Alright you have thirty seconds to gloat, go.”

I flip over onto my stomach and stare intently at the clock on the wall.

“As much as I would love to rub my fucking awesome oracle skills in your guy’s face, I actually have something relevant to talk to you about.”

I flip back onto my back.

“…I’m listening…”

“ASB is having a party over at Marco's house. It’ll be almost all of the people in ASB, so if we don’t go we’ll be labeled losers forever.”

“Too late Eren. I hate to break it to you but the only one of us who isn’t a loser is Mikasa.”

Mikasa lightly slaps my shoulder at my comment, and I let out a snort at her reaction. Ever the mother hen, she doesn’t see the fact that she’s always been protecting a couple of losers.

“Oh my God Armin shut up. You’re the only loser here.”

“That’s incredibly petty; at least I can acknowledge the fact that I’m a loser. Thus proving that you are, in fact, a loser, the biggest loser of all.”

“Oh shit, I didn’t realize I was on a reality T.V. show, what did I win?”

“The fact that you just referenced the biggest loser proves how big of a loser you are.”

Before Eren can retort to my sick burn, Mikasa moves to sit in between us.

“I think going to the party sounds like fun. When is it?”

Triumphantly, Eren marches into his kitchen to look at his calendar.

“It’s this Saturday,” he yells back “so it’s tomorrow. Do you want to stay the night with us Armin? We can make a huge pillow fort in the den tonight and give you a ride in the morning. In fact, I don’t think dad is going to be back until Sunday, so you can stay all weekend if you want, keep us company.”

I smile at the invitation, happy to spend some more time with them. “Yeah, a pillow fort and super sleepover sound like fun! I’ve got my backpack right here, so if one of you lets me borrow some clothes tomorrow I won’t even have to go home!”

“Your house is literally two blocks away you lazy fuck.” Eren returns from the kitchen with a bowl full of pretzels and sets them down on the table with a clatter “But whatever, I’m sure I can spare a pair of shorts. You better borrow the shirt from Mikasa though, hers will fit you better.” He starts walking back to the kitchen and yells back to me again “and don’t forget to ask me for a belt, I don’t want any embarrassing incidents on my hands.”

“Your clothes aren’t that loose on me.” I yell back, munching on a pretzel “and besides, I would rather have a loose shirt than a tight one.”

Eren returns from the kitchen with drinks this time. “Her shirts would probably be a bit loose on you too, my friend.” He sets the drinks down. “Don’t worry though, if you’re that desperate to steal my clothes I’ll lend you my jacket.”

“It’s a deal.” I smile coolly and pop open the lemonade can in front of me.

“I’ll go get you a shirt.” Mikasa yawns, rising from the couch with a stretch. “Eren, you go get him your shorts and jacket, and Armin, please start collecting things for the fort.”

We exchange smiles and she exits the room with Eren in tow. I immediately begin to strip the pillows and cushions from the couch. The last time we did this we only used blankets and pillows, but we agreed that it would be a lot cooler to use more stuff next time, so I’m being as creative as possible. When Eren and Mikasa come back downstairs I want to surprise them a bit, so I rush from room to room as quickly as possible, navigating an all too familiar labyrinth.

So by the time I hear Eren and Mikasa chattering as they descend the staircase, I am situated firmly in the den on top of a pile. A pile which, specifically, is made up of five throw pillows from the couch, seven cushions, three bean bag chairs that were already in the den, their dads mattress and four pillows along with all of his blankets and sheets, and a couple of miscellaneous stuffed animals.

The door creaks open to the sight of me smiling evilly from atop a pile of pure comfort. Eren bursts out laughing.

“Wow dude, you are great at collecting pillow fort shit.”

“Thank you.” I hop off the pile and move to the doorway with them.

“Come on, let’s go upstairs and grab all of the shit off our beds, we can surf on the mattress down the stairs. You’re lucky I have a bunk bed, or else you wouldn’t be able to experience the joys of mattress surfing.”

“That sounds fun, yet mildly dangerous.”

I follow them up the stairs anyways.

First we enter Eren’s room, and Mikasa grabs the corner of the mattress on his bottom bunk, shifting it off of the bed and onto the floor before kicking it out of the way. I climb up onto the top bunk and begin to plan our next course of action.

“Okay you guys, stand below me, I’m going to lower the mattress down to you as slowly as possible, try to catch it together.”

I begin to slowly edge the mattress off of the bed, until the first corner is hanging off, and then I start to shift it so that its horizontal, balancing myself on the bare bars of the bed and trying not to hit my head on the ceiling. Soon, progress is being made, Mikasa gets a good hold on the bed and Eren helps her lower it the rest of the way down. It isn’t exactly the most graceful process, but it’s effective.

As Eren and I begin to move the mattresses out of his room, Mikasa starts lightly jogging down the hall and into her own room, ready to retrieve her mattress.

Soon everything is ready for mattress surfing. Eren is first, and he stares down his stairs, mattress at the ready.

I begin the countdown. “3… 2…. 1… Go!”

I’ll admit, it was pretty anticlimactic. Even if the mattress wasn’t a fourth of the size of the staircase, it wasn’t all too fast. Faster than sliding down on your butt, but still not much of a thrilling experience. Mikasa and I tried it nonetheless. Our expectations were low enough to make it somewhat enjoyable. That and Eren’s uncontrollable laughter, along with Mikasa’s attempts to make the mattress slide faster.

Needless to say, mattress surfing was over quickly and without much incident.

As we pushed the mattresses into the den, I noticed that it was almost one in the morning. I hardly felt tired at all, but at the same time I was exhausted.

“Hey you guys, it’s getting pretty late.” I close the door to the den and push the mattress against the wall. “We should finish the fort and go to bed as soon as possible.”

“Oh shit you’re right.” Eren releases a yawn fit to topple mountains and lazily stretches. “Just shove all of the mattresses together and build a wall around them with all of the other stuff. Keep the blankets though.”

And so we lay together like that, on top of a single mattress, amongst a pile of pure pointlessness. Our hearts seem to beat in tandem, our fates seem intertwined. I love them like this, as they are. I love them as they toss about, as their limbs try to find a comfortable resting place. I love how they settle against me, all of our limbs intertwined as if it will keep us safe. I feel safe. That is, until it becomes too much.

We kept a small nightlight on in the corner for old time’s sake, and it perfectly illuminates their faces. They are beautiful, and with each rise and fall of their chests my hormones grow stronger. I hate myself for the disgusting thoughts that flick through my head. I hate myself for betraying their trust like this. Unfortunately, I can’t help it.

So I gently untangle them from my limbs and silently leave the room, closing the door behind me.

I pad up the stairs, hating myself more and more with each step. One foot in front of the other, I maneuver down their halls. The halls they trusted me enough to let me inside time and time again. A sigh escapes my lips as I find myself in front of an all too familiar door. My cheeks flush in anticipation, shame, and embarrassment as my hand comes to rest on the doorknob before turning it and pushing the door open.

I take a step inside, breathe in, breathe out. My hand comes to rest on the cool counter of the bathroom sink as I stare at my flushed reflection in the mirror. I sigh, and scrape my hair back into a pony tail. I splash water on my face three times. I realize that we didn’t think to brush our teeth before going to sleep.

Damn.

I didn't bring a toothbrush, so I root around in the cabinets for some mouthwash. I gargle carefully, making sure to count to twenty before spitting. Then I stare at myself in the mirror some more.

I just want to stop thinking about the two of them, the smoothness of their skin and the softness of their curves. I don’t want to do this to them, I don’t want to be a bad friend. But slowly, a certain ache begins to remind me that my attempts are, in fact, futile.

So I sit down on the toilet. Then I slowly unzip my jeans before shimmying them off. I trace circles on my stomach, trying to forget the ache that is coming from slightly lower.

And then…

I just stop trying.

I lower my hand beneath my waistband, gasp, and bite my lip.


	2. I love having fun with you

When I wake up I am greeted by a blast of morning breath from both sides. My friends breathe through their mouths and I can tell that no amount of tooth brushing would have done much to combat the stench. Propping myself up on my elbows, I turn to check the clock on the desk in the corner. Luckily, it's big enough so I can see the time if I squint a bit, and I can discern that it is ten fifty in the morning. 

I fall back onto the mattress and stare up at the ceiling for a good thirty seconds before reluctantly sitting up. 

I should probably make breakfast- If that's even what it's called this late in the morning. Well, I guess we're still breaking our fast so... Yes anyways, I'll make some breakfast and surprise the two of them. 

I pad into the kitchen and begin to lazily search the cupboards and fridge for materials to make something breakfast worthy. I guess pancakes will do. 

I pull the cinnamon, pancake mix, vanilla extract, and sprinkles from the cupboards. Next I scrounge through the fridge for some whip cream, blueberries, strawberries, chocolate chips, milk, and eggs. Then it's time to get to work. I place two mixing bowls separate from each other, knowing that Mikasa will want blueberry pancakes and Eren will want chocolate chip. I'll just eat some of each, whatever happens to be left over. 

After mixing cinnamon, vanilla extract, pancake mix, milk, and eggs into both the bowls I add blueberries in one and chocolate chips into the other. I'll let them garnish their pancakes with any combination of the strawberries, sprinkles, and whip cream later. 

Just as I've finished chopping the strawberries and setting out the toppings, I hear a faint conversation coming from the den. I smile softly to myself and begin greasing the pan before turning on the burners and yelling to the two zombies padding down the hall. 

"Rise and shine sleepyheads! I'm making pancakes!" 

If there is a sound to someone perking up, I just heard it. Mikasa and Eren both stride into the room with at least some semblance of a grateful smile.

I swear I almost do a double take at their choice in sleepwear though. They match. They match and it’s the cutest goddamn thing since that one cat video. Both of them are wearing oversized old band t-shirts over underwear. Both shirts are black, but Mikasa’s proudly displays the Beatles most famous album cover, while Eren’s simply states “She’s My Cherry Pie” in big bold letters across the front. I guess Eren’s isn’t technically a band t-shirt, but it sure does get the song stuck in your head.

I try and fail not to notice that Mikasa isn’t wearing a bra. I also try and fail not to notice that Eren’s boxers are not only pretty short, but also nice and snug. Fortunately for me, Eren’s boxers happen to feature Spongebob designs. The sight effectively snaps me out of my hormone fueled revere and throws me into a fit of silent giggles. 

After a minute pause involving eyes widening and mouths visibly watering, Eren speaks up first. "Aw yeah! Armin, you are legit the best, thanks dude!"

Once Eren has finished bounding over to the table and almost knocking her over in the process Mikasa nods and smiles, thanking me gratuitously as well.

I mumble a "no problem" blushing slightly at their enthusiasm, and turn back to making pancakes. 

"Aw man, you even set out toppings! Seriously dude, you either need to marry me right now or start a restaurant." 

I blush even harder at Eren's comment, ignoring the first part before I can get my hopes up and responding to the second instead. "A restaurant sounds nice actually. Maybe I would set it up with an ocean view, right in that place where the smell of fish isn’t as strong, and the water is almost clear. Remember that place? It was so cool." 

Mikasa speaks up wistfully, twisting in her barstool to get a better view of my place by the stove. "We haven't been to those cabins since the seventh grade. We should go back sometimes. It's very nice there."

Eren twists lazily back and forth in his stool. "Yeah, we should go there after graduation, Mikasa can drive." 

I turn to scold Eren for signing Mikasa up as driver without her permission, but she doesn't really seem to mind. I give the pancakes one final flip instead and then hold my hand out to Eren 

"go grab some plates please." 

He hands me three, and I set one to the side, putting two pancakes each on the other two plates.

"Two blueberry pancakes for you" I say, sliding the plate to Mikasa "and two chocolate chip for you." I slide the other plate to Eren. Eren just stares at the plate with a slack jaw. Then he turns to face me with an incredulous expression.

"I am going to kiss you Armin." I feel myself turn beet red as Eren rises from his position at the island. "I am going to kiss you full on the mouth Armin, prepare yourself."

"No!" I stumble away from him, but he just flops his full weight on top of me and starts making kissing noises near my face, persisting despite my best efforts to dodge his attacks. Mikasa rises from her stool as well, and relief washes over me. 

Ah, a savior at last.

Or so I thought. Instead Mikasa wraps her arms around both Eren and myself, and then gives me a quick peck on the cheek. Eren quickly abandons his quest for my lips and settles for pecking my cheek as well.

Then they both release me, and I sink to the ground, covering my overheated face and whining. 

"Why?"

"It’s because we love you Armin." Eren speaks up despite an obvious mouthful of food, and I peek through my fingers in time to see Mikasa nod sincerely, chewing on food as well. 

I sigh and lift myself from the ground, then set about making another batch of pancakes, still blushing fiercely. 

\------

"...and then she literally climbed the tree. She just climbed right up to one of the highest branches and hung there for five minutes. I swear I timed it right, I promised not to sabotage."

It is six batches of pancakes and a couple... Interesting stories about how Eren lost twenty bucks to Sasha later, and I am swirling a spoon through my chocolate milk and laughing at him wholeheartedly. Everyone knows it's a bad idea to bet Sasha anything at all, even if you find a way to sabotage it. 

Then again, it's also a bad idea to bet Eren anything, so they were pretty evenly matched.

 

“Hey, do you guys want to play some sort of game?” I’m getting kind of tired of these stories.

“Hide and go seek? ...Maybe Mario kart?” Eren seems to like both of his ideas and looks as though he is seriously weighing his decision.

“Well, how about Uno?” Mikasa offers up yet another decision, much to Eren’s horror.

I decide to add to the list of decisions. “What about monopoly?”

“Hell no”

Well at least Eren can decide what he doesn’t want to do.

“Jeez! What about Mario party then?”

He seems to like my second suggestion better.

“Why don’t we play them all?”

“That’s a wonderful idea Mikasa, “ I bounce out of the stool and stand next to the two of them where they are seated “we can play a round of each game. We can play them like a tournament. Whoever wins the least has to make lunch.”

Both seem to like my idea, so we move a small magnetic whiteboard and prop it up on the couch, then label each game in the order we will play them. It works out pretty poorly. I soon realize that if we play four games it’s pretty likely that we will not have a definite loser.

“Scrabble too?” I offer up, a bit exasperated.

Neither of the two object, and I put scrabble fifth on the board.

“Rules for hide and go seek are: if you aren’t found after five minutes, you win. Eren chose Mario Kart so he gets to choose what track we play, and I chose Mario party so I get to choose the board, therefore it is only fair that Mikasa gets to go seek. All in favor say aye.”

Both Mikasa and Eren respond with a resounding “aye” and then the games begin. Mikasa is given a timer with sixty seconds on it and placed in a corner.

“On your mark… get set… go!”

Eren and I shoot off in different directions. I head upstairs for the bathroom between Eren and Mikasa’s bedrooms, knowing that the cupboard under the sink is practically barren. Eren stays on the bottom floor, heading for the hallway that leads away from the kitchen and living room.

I lose sight of his figure when I make it to the top of the stairs, blocked by my own position. That is to say, I couldn’t see him because I had to hunch over and wheeze for a couple seconds to recuperate from my journey up the stairs. I need to work out more. 

As my feet stomp across the hardwood floor of the hallway, the sound of Mikasa counting down from ten assaults my ears. The dreaded “ready or not, here I come” is soon to follow. My bear feet slide across the floor as I turn sharply into the bathroom doorway, crashing into the wooden frame as I struggle with the doorknob and fling the door open. My head whips around. “…Six... “ My fingers reach out to touch the dull grey handles on the cabinet door. “…Five…” I open the cherry red cabinet doors, finding the space as empty as it always has been. “…Four…” I remember to shut the bathroom door again, using my foot to kick it closed. “…Three…” I cram my body into the dark cabinets, tucking my feet in underneath me. “…Two…” I close the cabinet doors, sealing myself in darkness. “One! Ready or not, here I come!” Mikasa’s words are so excited that they barely seem muffled through even one full floor of stairs and two sets of doors. Then again, that level of noise is kind of in the job description of a cheerleader.

I sing the alphabet in my head thirteen times, ticking off each one with a finger before the door to my hiding spot finally creaks open. Eren gives me a shit- eating grin and points to Mikasa behind him. 

"Four minutes, forty two seconds. We found you, loser."

"I am aware of that, cheater." I grin back at him nonetheless.

This loss doesn't matter, there's still four other games. Next is Mario kart, and Eren chooses yoshi falls as the track. We're all pretty evenly matched at the game, but there is a reason that Eren chose yoshi falls. Eren rocks that track in ways that would make yoshi himself cry tears of joy. Or at least that's what he screamed at the screen when he kicked our asses every round. Mikasa and I alternated between second and third every now and again because, let's be honest, yoshi falls is an easy track.

So Eren and Mikasa have won one game each in this little tournament, but I'm not really all that concerned, I know I'm going to win at Mario party. I chose koopas tycoon town, which is pretty similar to monopoly. Let me tell you, I am a wise investor, and this game is easy as pie, especially when you've played it so many times you can name and explain each mini game by memory.

 

I invest methodically, letting them believe they have the advantage while I'm really just plotting to steal their hotels near the end of the game, and saving up on slow go candy (much to erens apparent amusement) so as to hit as many bonus spaces as possible. I hit donkey kong at least four times. Never hit bowser. I ended the game with all of my coins wisely depleted. They were spent on hotels which brought me fifteen stars and two bonus stars. Astounding compared to Eren's three stars (from a hotel that I mostly just left for the sake of his pride) and Mikasa's seven (she managed to get two of her hotels back by the end of the game, and a bonus star for the most candy bought)

All in all, it was pretty fun (though I don't think Eren trusts me anymore).

"Oh my god." Eren's face is buried in a throw pillow and his laughter seems more amazed than anything. "I should have seen that coming man, you're totally obsessed with this game. Though, I think you kicked my ass harder than I've ever had it kicked. In fact, I'm pretty sure you let me have that hotel, you literally could have just stole it no problem. But, now that we have been ensured that your Mario party eight game is strong as all hell, how about..." He dramatically reaches under the pillow he's clutching and pulls out a video game "...Mario party nine!"

"No way Jose, we have a schedule and we need to finish up soon, I'm hungry" I pat my stomach to emphasize the emptiness.

Eren gives a sort of harrumph and sets the box back on the table. "Suit yourself dude."

Obviously, hide and go seek only took five minutes, and Mario kart only took around ten, but Mario party took almost three hours. I put it on fifty rounds, much to the horror of both of my friends. They were right to question my judgment. That was hellishly long. 

Mikasa stands up and heads to where her car keys are resting on the counter. "It's probably not the best idea to keep playing at this point, we're all hungry and playing any more games would just make it worse. I'll drive to subways and we can get some sandwiches, we'll split the bill."

I turn to smile at her. "Sounds good to me! Do you want to split a footlong?"

"You like avocado and turkey, right? That sounds good right about now, sure."

Eren pouts at our exchange and interjects. "Wait, I want in-n-out burger though, what is it with you guys and your healthy habits?" I turn to him with a sigh. "Eren, while I will not deny how awesome in-n-out is, it's always super busy. Totally not worth it right now, I'm too hungry."

“All right, all right I’ll go to subways with you.” Eren mumbles as he begins to open the front door.

I giggle a little bit at him as the silver doorknob turns beneath his hand. “That’s great and all Eren, but you might want to put on some pants first.”

Eren’s entire body tenses as his face turns a deep, sort of blood orange color.

“Shit.”

With that he does a sharp turn and marches himself down the hall and back into his room.

Finally, after I borrow some clothing from the both of them, (just an asb shirt from our school and some shorts) we are ready to leave. About damn time, too. That game of Mario party left me feeling claustrophobic. Even if I did win. 

Mikasa forced both of us to sit in the back, which kind of lead me to spend the entire car ride to subways pondering over how well thought out it was. She knew that both of us wanted the front seat before we even attempted to get in, judging by the fact that she simply leaned over and locked the door. She also knew that the argument would last a while, so she just locked it to both of us to settle everything then. Finally, she knew that we couldn't stay angry at her for very long, judging by her bemused glances at Eren's grumbling. Despite the fact that it made us look even more like a single mother with two troublesome children, it was well thought out. Respect. 

\-----

"So the party is in about an hour or two" Eren chews through his sandwich "we should probably get going soon."

Mikasa and I both nod in agreement and file out the door after finishing our sandwiches 

Eren tried to climb into the passenger seat, but Mikasa effectively banished him with a glare and a "don't you fucking dare." 

Then he decided it would be fun to dick around in the backseat while Mikasa gets to sit and shoot silent glares from the front. So we spent the ride to Marco's house looking all the more like a mother with two troublesome children. Again.

\-------

"Hey guys, welcome!" Marco greets us (along with a very grumpy looking Jean.)

"We come bearing soda." Eren holds out two two liter bottles of Pepsi.

Marco grabs the bottles and immediately hands them off to a very surprised looking Jean- who barley manages to catch them before they hit the ground.

"Come in, come in. Let me give you the low-down. Ok, so first of all my parents are awesome and have left me alone for the weekend. As long as the house isn't in a total state of disrepair when they get home, they said it's fine if I "host a small gathering." My older brother brought me some booze and told me that I better have at least three good stories when all is said and done. I expect to have five. Jean and I are the designated drivers"- Jean makes a sour face at that. It is doubtful that he willingly applied for the position. -"So if you need anything we will be in the corner making out." 

"Marco!" Jean turns beet red and elbows him in his side. 

"Ow! I mean, if you need anything we will be in the corner totally NOT making out." 

Jean slaps Marco's shoulder with a look of endearment on his face. "Man, ever since this party started you've been acting like that guy Leonardo Di Caprio played!"

"Ok first of all, ow again. Second, I doubt you mean that I've been acting mysterious and enigmatic, so I assume you aren't talking about Gatsby?"

Jean snaps his fingers and seems to search the air for the name of Leonardo's character. "No, I mean that other guy... The... The. The Wolf of Wall Street!"

"Ew, I hated that movie." Marco's face contorts into one of disgust. 

"You're the one that made me watch it in the first place! There were so many naked chicks. For no reason at all. Wasn't there a whole boat full of them at one point? I mean, not that it wasn't easy on the eyes... But it certainly wasn't easy on the brain. I pity any poor, impressionable kid who watches that godforsaken movie." 

Marco shudders at Jean's complaint. "Yeah, I bet they spent the whole budget of that movie on strippers alone. The only good scene was that one in the nursery. I liked that one until Leo decided to become a little shit with the security camera."

"Yeah, I could tell." 

At that point, I begin to edge away from the two, drawing Eren and Mikasa with me. 

"Somehow it felt like they kind of forgot we were there." 

I tune Eren out for a bit. I completely agree with his musings, but I want to get a chance to take in the unfamiliar surroundings.

Truly, Marco's house is a sight I am loathe to have missed. It's beautiful. The faint light of day still shining through the window brightens the room along with the sparkling glass chandelier on the ceiling. The entire house positively reeks of good taste. Carved wooden frames painted with gold hold the obviously treasured memories of the family. One such frame cradles the image of a freckled man with greying hair holding a chubby infant tenderly in his arms. Another shows a brunette woman with a seemingly serious disposition staring off into the distance as a banner advertises her intent to right the town as mayor. Further inspection reveals a drawing that was obviously created in Marco's later childhood, which proudly displays his immense talent as an artist. Others still contain more images of his parents, as well as some other faces that presumably belong to his siblings. 

The spacious room practically glistens with cleanliness, with not a speck of dirt tainting the polished wooden floors. 

The open and inviting room has a spiraling staircase leading up to the second floor, and down into what is presumably the basement. There is also an open glass doorway revealing a kitchen with a few people milling about inside. Everything about the house practically screams of his parents affluence and impeccable taste. It practically sends me into a state of awe over how sheerly gorgeous it is. 

"Wow, this is a really nice house." 

I am snapped out of my revere by Eren's comment, and simply shake my head in agreement. He's right, the house is beautiful. Marco is lucky his party just consists of a bunch of asb nerds. Otherwise the house wouldn't be nice for long. 

I turn to express the sentiment to Mikasa and Eren but they have ventured into the kitchen and seem to be pouring themselves a drink. The drink is probably alcoholic. I release a deep sigh and wander off after them. Might as well try some.


	3. Princess Guacamole is the Love of My Life

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back two years later with a brand spanking new update! Sorry it took so long. I kinda got annoyed with the person I was using to write this, but in the end I decided that my guilt was more important. So here you go, only one more chapter you guys!

I'm pretty sure I'm drunk. Like 99 percent certain. I'm also pretty sure the room shouldn't be spinning? It's quite confusing actually. I think I need to sit down. 

\-------

Fuck sitting down. I'm going to go find my friends. Last I saw Mikasa and Eren they were hella drunk too. I need to make sure they're alright.

\--------

"Hey Marco" the chocolate brown hair is released from the grip of a pale hand as Marco disentangles himself from Jean with an audible pop. 

"Yeah?" Marco clears his throat to dispel the strained voice plaguing him. "What's up Armin?" 

Jean glares at me over Marco's shoulder and I shoot him a sheepish grin. "Sorry to bother you guys" woah that came out a lot more slurred than I thought it would "but I wanna know if you know where-" a hiccup escapes my lips "- Eren and Mikasa went?"

Both Marco and Jean shoot me a worried look, and then exchange one between themselves. "Hey bud, have you been drinking a lot?" Marco pats my shoulder lightly, furrowing his brows. 

"Yeah-" damn these hiccups "-a little." 

"Sounds like a little too much to me buddy." 

"I'm fine, so good right now, thanks you for asking Joon."

Fucking nailed it. They'll never suspect how drunk I am. 

"Yeeeeah buddy, sure. Um last I saw, they were on the top floor. Then again..." his eyes flicker and rest upon Jean's smirk "I've been a bit busy"

"Thanks buddy" I'm so goddamn grateful. So fucking grateful. I have never felt this intensely grateful in my life. I need to show how much- I need to hug this guy. "I love you man." I pat Marco's back, my arms tangled around his stiff figure. Jean snorts in the background. 

"Yeah.." Marco peels me carefully off of him and eyes me from a safe distance. "Love you too bud."

\---------

Okay top floor, time to explore. Oh man. Oh boy. I rhymed. I am a poetic genius. Bury me in my own massive intellect please. 

I just ascend the massive spiraling staircase with the grace and agility of a cat. I totally do not fall on my face. What massive bruise on my forehead? There is no bruise, what are you talking about? Sasha and Connie start singing "she's Beauty, she's Grace, she's Miss United States" but are soon cut off by their own howling laughter when they catch sight of my glare. 

"Fuck you guys," I pout, rubbing my forehead "that hurt."

Connie and Sasha both gasp loudly and Sasha pivots her arms and hits Connie in the face. 

"Connie, Connie," Sasha shrieks directly into Connie's ear "did ya hear that? He cussed!" 

"yeah I heard, a broken nose does not equal hearing loss. Though I'm pretty sure if you keep yelling in my ear like that, hearing loss will ensue."

"Oops. Sorry."

Sasha does not sound sorry at all.

I continue up the stairs, stumbling over mahogany flooring, running fingers over polished cherry red wood. My feet hit carpet and I trip over nothing. Solid ground at last. Time to explore. 

The dimly lit hallway before me is decorated sparsely with more pictures of the family, along with a few flowers in expensive looking vases. My hand fumbles on the first door knob in front of me, opening without knocking, nearly falling flat on my face in the process, and getting an eyeful of Ymir and Christa's tongues. I wolf whistle and get a bra thrown at me for my efforts. Definitely not something I needed to see. 

Time to continue on. Next door. I fiddle with the knob, giving an irritated tsk when it doesn't open. Wait- it's a pull door. Not a push door. Duh. I open the door to another gratuitous eyeful of teenaged shenanigans. The only thing covering Annie's chest is Reiner's massive yaoi hands. I give a shudder and continue to stand in the doorway, forgetting that shit's impolite until I notice Bert blushing and sweating profusely, naked except for the pillow on his lap. 

Reiner stares incredulously.

"Do you mind?"

Right

"Sorry bro"

I'm saying bro a lot today. That is once, which is more than usual. The door closes behind me with a slight thud and the sound of Reiner muttering something about boner killing wide eyed innocence. 

I stop dead in my tracks. I probably should have realized this earlier, but I think Annie, Bert, and Reiner were having a threesome. Good for them I guess. I'm a little jealous though. They got their shit together. I'm still a mess.

In fact, why is everyone at this party making out but me? Well Connie and Sasha aren't making out either. But they're more of the short and sweet kiss type. Also I'm pretty sure one or both of them is ace. 

Goddamn. There must be something in the air. Maybe hormones. Probably hormones. We are a bunch of teens after all. The fact that we're a bunch of drunk teens to boot does not help.

Third time's the charm. I barge into the next room, and very much do not stumble over my own feet, thank you very much. It's a bathroom. No one here. Just a very large lizard chilling in the tub. I make eye contact with the lizard. The lizard stares back. Slowly, it flicks it's tongue out in a vaguely threatening manner. I quickly close the door behind me. That was fucking surreal. 

"Hey Marco!"

I lean over the banister, hearing Jean groan as I interrupt them. Seriously they have to be annoyingly turned on by now. How can they just casually make out for hours. Anyways.

"Why is there a huge ass lizard in your tub?"

"Oh guac? She's just in there so she doesn't terrorize you guys. Don't worry, she likes the tub."

"Who the fuck names their lizard guac?"

Marco and Jean both start when I say the word fuck. I guess it is pretty unusual of me. 

"Uh" Marco chuckles nervously "my brother chose it when he was ten and cried when I said it was stupid. So."

I narrow my eyes and back away, nodding.

"Okay, bye Armin."

I don't respond. I have shit to do.

Time to aquatint myself with guac. 

"Hello princess guacamole. You are the light of my life. I love you."

Guac blinks at me. She loves me too. I know it. She closes her eyes and nuzzles into my hand as I pet her head and coo incoherently. 

"You love me, don't you my little guacamole friend?"

Guac doesn't respond. Because she is a lizard. Which makes me the idiot talking to a lizard. I need to find Eren and Mikasa stat before I do something embarrassing in front of more than just a nice and understanding lizard who loves me very much.

"Goodbye Guacamole" 

Guacamole looks sad. 

"Don't worry Guac I'll be back one day to steal you from Marco."

The ungrateful whore. Why is he making out with Jean when he has all of this waiting in the tub for head pats from him. It's unethical. 

But this is besides the point. It's time for me to find my friends. Thus, I leave the bathroom with much regret in regards to the fact that I'm abandoning my new friend. I'm sure she'll get by. 

My quest for the two idiots continue. I stumble down the hall with little regards for the foreign concept that is balance, making my way to the next door. It's a closet with what looks like a very large exacto knife inside it. I touch the blade to see if it's real. Like an idiot. It isn't though, so that's good.

Last door. This one better have Eren and Mikasa behind it or I'm going to flip. I barge in like knocking is a disease and I'm an anti vaccer. That is, like I'm an idiot with little to no regard for a very important thing. 

I get a face full of the same skin from my dreams. Every curve, every line, everything exposed to my eyes. There they are, the loves of my life, proving once and for all that they really don't need me. 

Eren is laid back on the bed, gasping for breath as he clutches Mikasa's hips like a lifeline. How beautiful this sight before me is. Her head is thrown back as she rides him, flushed and perfect and grinding her hips enticingly with little effort.

Then Eren makes eye contact. Like a deer in the headlights I freeze completely. But Eren, he just smiles. 

Fuck.

I slam the door behind me and walk quickly; flushing with shame and arousal, to the bathroom.


	4. the good shit

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is pretty much just the saga ending and then like 4,000 extra words of porn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been 3 years and i'm so glad I finally am free

Sunday  
\----  
To be smitten is to be besotted with, enraptured by, or enamored of. It is also a past participle of the word smite. At the moment, this seems appropriate.

\----  
Saturday  
\----

Jean cuts off from an annoyed groan when he sees my face, namely the tears streaming down it. He makes a choked laugh like noise when he sees the lizard cradled happily in my arms.

"Take me home."

Marco glances at Guac questioningly.

"Are... Are you taking Guac with you?"

"Yes."

Marco seems to contemplate this response, and the tears on my face, and to make a decision.

"...okay."

 

\------

The ride home is awkward.

"Um. Are you going to give Guac back any time soon?"

I shake my head silently.

"Okay I'll come pick her up tomorrow. Do you have lettuce?"

I nod my head.

"Just give her the lettuce and stick her in the tub. She should be fine for the night."

There is an awkward pause. Marco doesn't seem to know how to deal with this. 

"Do you want to talk about it?"

I shake my head.

He nods in solemn support and turns back to face the road.

The rest of the drive is spent in silence.  
\-----

Sunday Again, for real this time  
\-----

I have the worst hangover in the history of mankind. I'm sitting in complete darkness and silence in my room, bonding more with Guac. 

I wonder if I can eat a whole pint of ice cream in one go.

\----

Sunday still, two hours later  
\-----

I have learned a valuable life lesson. Just because you can, doesn't mean you should.

I ate the whole tub of ice cream, which means I've been subject to a few particularly intense brain freezes over the course of the past hour or so. I am also very cold and sick to my stomach. Guac nuzzles against my side affectionately. She's my only real friend. I feed her more lettuce in place of champagne, and she seems content to munch on it while I search for my headphones. All this betrayal makes me feel like some good old 2005 fall out boy.  
\----  
I've long since finished Champagne for my Real Friends Real Pain for my Sham Friends and am listening to The Music Or The Misery and trying not to cry into my toilet bowl when I hear the doorbell. 

It's probably Marco. I was hoping he would wait a little longer to pick guac up, but such is life at the moment. Disappointing. Unhappy. Full of strife. Or at the very least full of synonyms to distract me from said strife as I trudge down the stairs to meet the one who wants to whisk my only confidant away in this, my time of need.

 

Yeah, the little shit is definitely a large source of strife in my life. I discover as much when I open the door to see not just Marco standing there, but Eren and Mikasa as well. 

"Marco!" I sound scandalized. I'm sure I look it too. In fact, I'm sure even guacamole looks scandalized right now. Why wouldn't she, she is the only one who understands me. She understands why I am quite thoroughly scandalized at the moment. Why Marco is a bad, bad friend.

Eren and Mikasa are not welcome here. Eren and Mikasa are people I am currently trying to avoid. People who look... well they look like shit. They look more hungover than me, and that's saying something. 

In fact, they look like such shit that I'm absolutely certain I've been staring for longer than strictly necessary. I snap away my gaze and glare at Marco expectantly.

He winces at my expression. "Look Armin, I need Guac back, you don't know how to take care of her. I'm sorry," he scoops Guac out of my arms and turns to leave "but you aren't going to work your problems out by talking to a lizard. Have fun you guys."

And just like that, Marco is gone, speed walking to his car and escaping the walloping I would have laid on him if he stayed. The utter ass. 

Eren looks sheepish. As he should. 

 

“He probably just wanted an excuse to dump us off onto you, you know. Us being the terrible sloppy hangover people who were crowding up his guest room.”

“Out of the things you've done to his guest room, or in it I should say, I think sleeping in it is the least of his concerns. I hope he cleans the sheets before anyone else comes to visit.” I mentally pat myself on the back for that comeback, feeling smug and a lot happier than before.

"Right to the point then” Eren rubs the back of his neck, his eyes flickering to Mikasa before settling on me “Look, Armin I'm so sorry you had to see that, it was probably really gross for you." 

Mikasa pushes past me into my living room and Eren follows like a guilty puppy.

I turn around, close the door behind me, cross my arms, and sigh "I didn't think it was gross Eren."

"Really?” Eren seems surprised “Then why are you so upset? I don't believe that you weren't just a little affected by it, you looked horrified."

"I was affected by it Eren. It affected me a lot. It made me realize how fucking dumb I was being.” I throw my hands into the air and roll my eyes up to the sky “I should have known that this would happen. I mean it was so obvious! You two are just so…” I make a vague and gesture in their direction “perfect. You're both perfect, which means you're perfect for each other. And I really, really shouldn't have been so naive as to think that this would last."

"What do you mean by "this?" Eren seems alarmed. Which in itself is alarming to me. I mean I thought I was being fairly obvious about how I felt.

"This!” I make a wide sweeping gesture around the room “Us, the three of us, our happiness in being friends, in being together. I think I knew deep down that you two would realize that you're perfectly happy without me, that all you needed was each other. But I was really, really hoping that it wouldn't be so sudden or so soon."

Mikasa gives me a sharp look from her perch on my couch. "Who said anything about our friendship being in jeopardy, Armin? We still love you, and you're not going to suddenly become unnecessary while we... work things out."

"But that's just it. You don't love me. Not the way I love you."

"Armin, are you upset because you're jealous of Mikasa and I?" Eren still has that stupid, shell shocked look on his face. “Are you in love with Mikasa?"

"Yes, isn't it obvious?”

"...shit" Eren runs a hand through his hair, and it's quickly becoming the messiest I've seen it. He still looks amazing.

I shake my head and sigh. "Exactly. Shit. That's exactly what I've spent the last oh, I don't know, decade or so thinking about. My feelings are shit!"

Eren runs his fingers through his hair nervously. "I didn't think this would happen Armin. I thought you, you know, loved Mikasa in a sisterly way. And a decade, seriously? That's a fucking long time Armin, why haven't you said anything?"

"Look, I thought you loved Mikasa in a sisterly way too. I mean, I always knew that you two were perfect together, I just didn't think that you knew it too. I thought I would have more time with you before you figured it out. And I didn't say anything because it's not like I ever had a chance in hell."

"Of course you had- you have a chance! I mean-” he sighs “look, I know better than to speak on Mikasa’s behalf, but if it were me you would totally have a chance!” 

His statement hangs in the air for a while, and I stare, absolutely and obviously dumbfounded, until Eren catches his mistakes and slowly turns a violent red.

“Fuck, I mean, uh. Look, you have a chance with anyone with eyes, Armin. You're so smart, and loyal, and, you know,” he blushes harder and soldiers on “attractive and stuff.”

“So essentially, you’re saying I have a chance with Mikasa.. And with you. Because I have a chance with everyone with eyes.”

“Yes, exactly!”

I feel like i’m on the verge of tears. It’s been so long. I’ve loved them for so goddamn long, and now they're telling me I have a chance? I can't believe that.

"Don't do that Eren."

"Don't do what?"

 

I can feel all the blood rushing to my head. I’m embarrassed, and sad, and I know there's a tear hanging on to my eyelashes, but i can't talk and keep it there. So I let it go. It falls down my face and I don't even bother to wipe it away. I just steel myself.

"Don't make me hope like that. I've had enough goddamn hope. All it's good for is making the disappointment that much worse. I know you don't love me like I love you."

“What?”

“It’s not just Mikasa. It’s both of you”

"Oh.” He’s astounded.

“Oh!” He’s... happy for some reason.

“ Hey!” Now he’s offended.

“You can't know that!” he takes a step forward and rests a hand over his heart. “I do love you like that, and I still can't speak for Mikasa but I know she loves you one way or another. We can work something out, even if she doesn't."

Mikasa pushes herself off the couch and joins Eren. "No, you're right Eren. I love him too."

Mikasa takes a step closer to me and meets my eyes defiantly as I stand frozen in place. After a while I choke out a hoarse "I don't believe you."

She steps closer still, then closes the distance all at once and kisses me. It's the best kiss I've ever had because I'm finally feeling my lips brush against hers and it feels like a release of something that has been building for years. Like a breath of air after almost drowning. It makes my chest ache and my lungs burn and that probably has more to do with the fact that i’m holding my breath than with the kiss itself.

She slips her tongue past my lips ever so gently and it's the worst kiss I've ever had because my mouth tastes like vomit and my head is still pounding and I'm reeling with shock and i’m so worried that she knows all of this. 

She puts her hand on my jaw and walks me up into the wall and it's definitely the best kiss i’ve ever had because I've never been kissed like this in my life. Passionately. She holds my face in her hands and she just keeps holding on as she sucks my bottom lip into her mouth and rubs her thumb across my cheek. I make a noise like I'm dying and hear it being echoed somewhere, probably by Eren, and just like that it's over. 

My entire front feels cold, like Mikasa sucked all the warmth with her when she stopped kissing me. I touch my lip dazedly with my fingers. They're tingling a little bit. Eren looks shocked and more than a little aroused. Mikasa looks satisfied, she has a wicked gleam of victory in her eyes and her cheeks are flushed a light pink. 

Eren wipes a sheen of sweat from his upper lip and wrings his hands nervously, looking up at me through his lashes. I catch his eyes and a look of determination flashes across his face as he crosses the distance between us in two short steps and then closes it abruptly, snaking an arm around my waist and yanking me forward until our foreheads gently come together. We rest like that, breathing each other in, neither willing to make the first move, lips barely ghosting across each other. Tentatively he moves his hand down until it rests on my tailbone. He closes his eyes and I feel his lashes flutter lightly over my cheekbone. 

The back of my neck briefly tingles in warning before Miksa brushes my hair aside and bites down lightly, starling me forward just enough so that Eren and I are forced to kiss properly, if chastely. We pull apart once more and Mikasa huffs in annoyance and, to my great surprise, pinches my ass. I barely bite back a whimper, but I can’t stop my hips from jolting forward and my cock from giving an interested twitch, which i’m sure Eren can feel seeing as my hips moved forward in such a way that I can most certainly feel his growing erection.

He smiles wickedly and I know he did for sure. A flash of something gentler comes over his face and cuts through the mischief before he leans in and kisses me again, grabbing my waist and pulling me closer, grinding our cocks together. 

 

I gasp into his mouth and he smiles, wrinkling his nose at me and laughing softly. “Maybe we should go brush our teeth before we take this any further.” 

My surprised laughter comes out huskier than I expected. “Alright, sounds like a plan.” I let go of Eren and adjust myself surreptitiously in my pants, turning towards my bathroom to finally brush my teeth. Really, I should have done this much earlier.

“So,” I mumble around the toothbrush in my mouth and make eye contact in the mirror with Mikasa. “You guys like me huh. How long has it been?”

Mikasa and Eren share a conspiratorial glance over my shoulder. Mikasa is the first to talk. “We've actually talked about this before, I think Eren was just surprised you reciprocated.” She smiles and gives a small chuckle. “I would have said something, but you both know I prefer to wait for Eren to finish whatever mess he’s making before I jump in.”

Eren hums indignantly, but soon seems to think better of his protest, deflating quickly. “The thing is-” Eren seems sheepish again “-we’ve sorta been doing this whole getting drunk and having sex thing for a while now. Which is part of why we didn’t end up including you. We got into my dad’s liquor cabinet a couple months ago and well…”

\------  
A couple months ago  
\------

“Okay.” Eren sets the bottle back on the carpet with all the finesse of an increasingly drunk teenager, Which is to say, the bottle falls over, barely spilling before Mikasa scoops it up and sets it on the table, the only evidence of her inebriation in the fact that she has to look at the table particularly hard to avoid missing it altogether. Her sharp gaze rests on Eren once more as soon as the bottle is safely deposited.

“Oopsies,” Eren giggles; a sound which can really only be made when he’s feeling at least a little tipsy.

“I chose truth, not stupid,” Mikasa helpfully reminds him. She internally applauds herself for the scathing burn on her part. Her wit has never been sharper.

“Right, right,” Eren slurs, “Okay, so. Truth. Would you rather fuck me or Armin?”

Mikasa's surprise is greatly evident, but it's replaced quickly with an assessing glance over Eren's person. She ponders the question for a while, and seems to make a decision. “You first.”

“What?”

“Me or Armin, who would you rather fuck?”

Eren blushes and bites back a quip about whether or not she’s offering that he knows he’d lose his tongue for. He just started to realize his feelings for Mikasa recently, but now that he thinks about it… Armin is not hard to look at. He loves armin, and he guesses that this fact combined with the fact that he has no qualms about spending the rest of his life with him means that it’s probably a thought that should be pursued further.

Mikasa’s eyes have grown incredibly soft. “I love you too Eren, and I think you have every chance with Armin.”

“I might but-” Eren adopts a wolfish grin “-it’s just you and me now, and you still haven't answered my question.”

\-------  
Sunday  
\-------

“I never did answer his question. After that his mouth was too busy to be asking me again.”

“So you guys talked about-” I’m blushing I know it “-fucking me, and then you go drunk and fucked each other instead a lot.”

“That’s about right,” Mikasa grins “but we were only drunk the first and last time; and just so you know, after the first time I was trying to be as obvious about it as possible to gauge your interest. I didn't tell Eren because I didn't want him to accidentally interfere. You were supposed to walk in on us, and that was just the successful try. When we slept in the fort together I guess you could say I…” she smiles “...tested Eren’s stamina while you slept. I was trying to let you catch us in the act then too. But that was then.”

She walks forward and slips her hand gracefully down my jeans. “This is now.”

My erection has hardly suffered from listening to the two talk, but it makes a valiant effort of sapping all blood from by brain as Mikasa works me in sure strokes across the length of my shaft. I can’t believe how well everything is falling into place. They love me too, and it feels like i’m living in a dream as Eren comes up behind me to gently kiss the back of my neck and toy with my hair. He lightly kisses the shell of my ear and mumbles a husky request for me to tie up my hair that I barely process through the pleasure from Mikasa’s hand as she twists over the head and wipes a bead of precum off with her thumb. 

He chuckles and tells Mikasa to leave me alone for a goddamn minute so I can get my hair up. Before I can process his statements and start fumbling around for a hair-tie, they’re kissing over my shoulder, then disconnecting and kissing in front of me so I can move freely. Eren hands me a hair tie from off Mikasa’s wrist and promptly slips a hand down her pants once I’ve taken it. I gape at them as I tie my hair up. Eren starts to kiss Mikasa’s neck and she laughs breathily, reaching out to haul me back in for a kiss. I’ve tied my hair a bit too tight, but hell if I’m going to stop kissing her to adjust it. Eren takes the fact that I’m pressing flush against his back as permission to grind his ass back against my cock, and I bite my lip against a moan. 

Eren unzips Mikasa’s pants with the hand not in them, and pulls both hands away while she shimmies out of them. He looks at me over his shoulder, smiles mischievously, and touches my lips with wet fingers. I suck them into my mouth, and I can taste Mikasa on my tongue. Eren’s gaze grows intense as I suck harder, soliciting a barely audible whimper from him. He turns around, trails his fingers out of my mouth, down my chin, my chest, all the way down to my zipper, then bites down on his lip and unzips me slowly, drawing my cock out from the confines of my underwear. The teeth of my zipper press underneath the bottom of my shaft uncomfortably, so I just take my pants all the way off. I close my eyes. A hand slides down my arm, small, calloused, rough, Mikasa’s; and one down my chest, bigger, softer, Eren’s. 

I feel a tongue tentatively make it’s way up from the base of my cock. My hands fly down and I feel a head of short, coarse hair. My eyes are suddenly wide open, and I can see that it's Eren and that he’s gained confidence from the hands I’ve bunched in his hair. Though I’m sure my blatantly loud moans aren't hurting much either. He’s taken the head into his mouth, and he’s beginning to work his way down the shaft slowly, torturously so.

Mikasa sucks on the side of my neck, one hand steadying herself on my shoulder, the other rubbing slow circles over her clitoris through her panties. To call them underwear would be a misnomer, they’re black, and lacy in a way that makes me feel somewhat underdressed. She smiles in a clear invitation and takes my hand, guiding it to her belly. My fingers twitch over the lace, but I'm not quite sure what to do.

“It’s your choice”

Hardly a choice at all, between reaching into her panties or clutching at her hip. My fingers dip inside and I’m almost shocked to find them so thoroughly soaked through. I have some idea what I’m doing, but no real frame of reference for where to touch. I know what I’m looking for, but it’s hard to find the clitoris without actually being able to see anything. So I rub my finger over the wet folds of her labia, dipping one inside her cunt to the first knuckle with ease. She shifts her hips, and I look her in the eye. Another finger. Both to the second knuckle now, I curl them inwards, as i’m certain that is the done thing. But I’m still unsure of how to find what i’m looking for.Through a haze I notice that Eren has abandoned my cock. I’m not sure when that happened, I wasn’t really paying attention to myself anyways. Helpfully, he leads my other hand above where my two fingers are inside her. The clitoris is my most important goal. No need to be too accurate, just long strokes down the center and up. Mikasa gasps, and begins to breathe more heavily, soon, too soon, she stops my hand. Says we should use a bed for what’s about to happen next. Once they’re out of the bathroom I awkwardly tuck myself back into my underwear- I simply don’t have the confidence to walk around with an exposed erection. When I catch up to Mikasa in the living room, she’s about to leave for the bedroom, but first she grabs her purse, smiles at me and winks. I’m sure she’s brought condoms, of course she has.

My bed is a tangle of pillows wrapped in a blanket, Eren flops onto it and immediately removes his shirt and throws it blindly away. His underwear follows soon after, and then he’s sitting naked on my bed. Mikasa, shirt missing- when did that happen- joins him, and my mouth suddenly receives a gush of saliva. I swallow conspicuously. Mikasa smirks, trails a finger down Eren’s bicep, teases the scar from a bike crash when we were eight, sends it back up again, tugs his hair until his head falls back. From her position seated behind him, she licks up his neck and takes his earlobe between her teeth.

“So Armin, what do you want to do now?”

I can only gape at her as she toys with Eren’s nipples, barely focusing on him, just light brushes with her thumb that have him squirming to find release in the empty air. She smiles benevolently and whispers something in Eren's ear, causing him to blush furiously as he tries to bury his face in his arm so that the tiny “yes” he gives is barely audible.

Mikasa smiles up at me. “Would you like to fuck him?” One of her hands has slipped down Eren's back, and it seems like she's moving it, stroking a finger down the cleft of his ass, over his hole, back up again. She continues to smile. “Well?”

In a surge of confidence I didn't know I was capable of I simply say “I would love to,” and find myself crawling up the bed towards them. Mikasa wordlessly grabs a bottle of lube from her bag and offers it to me. It's only half full, and I give Eren a look of surprise. His blush grows worse and he covers his face with his arm. I decide not to prod him further and instead move his hand aside for a kiss, all the while uncapping the lube and coating two fingers. Mikasa takes the bottle from me and murmurs “I'll help you get him ready,” drizzling lube over her own fingers and setting the bottle aside. 

Eren’s cock is hard and leaking simply from anticipation. This is ignored as Mikasa teases him with a circling finger, rubbing his asshole and coating it with lube before pushing in and to the third knuckle all at once. He lets out a sigh of breath that he had evidently been holding. Curious, I use one of my wet fingers to circle Eren's rim, feeling it twitch around Mikasa's finger. One of her hands comes up to start playing with his nipple and he squirms, a bead of precum dripping from his head onto my arm. I figure he's ready for another finger and stop circling to move mine in next to Mikasa's. He's relaxed, loose and pliant, unsure of where to give his attention with two pairs of hands and two mouths focusing on him. 

Only one of my hands is being put to use, so I use the other to toy with the head of his dick lightly. He keens and tries to buck into my hand, so I draw it away and rest it back on his thigh quickly. He's distracted by the loss, so I ease another finger inside, licking his nipple as I go. He's making such cute noises, he's obviously frustrated by our teasing. 

Mikasa takes her finger out and smiles at me. “You don't seem to need any help down here.”

I chuckle. “It was getting kinda cramped anyways.”

She moves some pillows out of the way and urges Eren to lay down. Absently, she props Eren's hips up with a pillow, then she throws her leg over him, straddling his chest. She slips two fingers into his mouth and he immediately begins to suck on them. “Alright then,” she murmurs, moving up so she's hovering over his face, gripping the headboard. Unexpectedly, Eren reaches up and pulls her hips down so she's sitting on his face, and she moans sharply. “Aha-I ne~ever get tired of that,” she says, grinding down on him. I briefly catch a glimpse of his tongue sliding into and then out of her and swallow thickly. 

Eren hums indignantly into Mikasa and pushes down onto my fingers, which have stilled inside him. Right. Time to shut my gaping jaw and finish what I’m doing. The lube on my fingers is starting to dry a little, so I put a new coat on, then resume what I was doing, scissoring two fingers inside of him. Curiously, I bend down to lick between my fingers. He moans so loud I can practically feel it rumble around me. Evidently Mikasa feels it much more vividly, as she responds with a moan of her own, then cranes her neck to turn around and see what I’m doing, murmuring a quiet “oh Jesus” when she makes eye contact with me.

I laugh quietly, and rear back slightly to look at my handiwork. I've used so much lube that he's dripping into my sheets just a little, and I can see his hole is stretched wide around my fingers, which are currently scissored out as far as they can go. He's still twitching a little, something that started after I licked him. 

Mikasa switches her legs over Eren so that she's looking at me now instead of the headboard, and I grin at her. “What?” She says, “it's not like I'm gonna-” she turns red and squeaks, and I can see Eren's tongue pulling back from her clit “-ahhjj-jesus Eren! Hah, ah, uh... well, you know, I wanted to watch or whatever,” she rushes out “now do that again.”

I'm not sure if she was talking to me or to Eren, but we both obey the command. I lean back down and lick his rim again lightly before just sticking my tongue into the gap between my fingers, which are honestly getting sore from being spread out and holding Eren open for so long. Besides, my fingers are kind of getting in the way now, so I slip them out gently. Using the hand that wasn’t inside Eren, I grip his thigh tightly, and try to spread his legs as wide as they’ll go. I shake out the other hand, easing the cramping, and then use it to hold his other thigh open as well. 

“Oh god, oh god that’s really fucking hot Armin, what the hell,” Mikasa is babbling. I didn’t have her pegged as a babbler. I look up to check on them and Mikasa is practically humping Eren’s face. She’s bright red, dripping sweat, her breathing is ragged, and she looks deliciously close, gasping loudly at irregular intervals. Eren has two fingers crooked inside her, and I’m honestly surprised he’s able to remember to do that. By the amount of grinding and moaning he’s doing, I’d say he’s just really well trained to focus on her. Jesus, how often have they been doing this? 

Eren adds a third finger and Mikasa starts to positively shake from the exertion of holding herself up, or the pleasure, god who knows. They look so good like this and It’s killing me, I’ve been so good holding myself back, but I’m starting to leak all over my boxer briefs, and all I want is to be inside him already. But I’m certain Mikasa is about to come, and I won’t begrudge her her show. Eren is leaking a steady stream of precum, and his hips jolt into the air when I use my thumbs to spread him open further and start to lick his rim again.

Mikasa’s using the hand that isn’t steadying herself on Eren’s chest to tease her nipple as we make eye contact again. “oh god, oh god, oh god.” She squeezes her eyes shut tightly, freezes, moaning loudly- legs trembling, fists clenched- and trembles apart around Eren’s fingers. After a long while of shaking and panting, she falls off Eren and onto the bed by his side, one of her legs still thrown over his chest. Eren gulps in air, and Mikasa moves her still shaking leg so that it isn’t crushing him too badly. Tear tracks are visible down Eren’s cheeks, and he’s still hiccupping in breaths loudly. Mikasa coos softly and strokes his face “oh honey I’m sorry, you need us to stop teasing you?” Eren nods, and buries his face into her shoulder, moaning. She gives me a sharp look and I realize I’ve been unknowingly stroking over his probably over sensitive hole with my thumb. 

Trembling slightly, I uncap the lube a third time. This time I don’t tease him, I just ease in three fingers to the hilt and crook up, searching for his prostate, still not quite knowing what i’m looking for. Out of the corner of my eye I see Mikasa leaning over and watch as she grabs a condom. Then I feel it, harder tissue, a somewhat defined structure that draws a loud, prolonged moan from Eren once pressed against. I ease off for now and reach over him to grab the condom from Mikasa. But before I can get it Eren grabs her wrist, blushing red from embarrassment now, not pleasure. “Uh, If you’re still clean, or a virgin or whatever, I want to…” he trails off, but neither Mikasa nor I take mercy on him. Or rather, Mikasa doesn't take mercy, and i’m much too shocked to say anything. “Um, you know, I want to feel it when you, you know, come inside me.”

At a loss for anything more eloquent to say I just blurt out a “that’s really hot,” and suffer the consequences of Mikasa snorting into her arm. She puts the condom back in her purse and strokes his stomach fondly. One last time, I grab the lube and coat myself, capping it again and tossing it to Mikasa. I slowly ease myself in, and Mikasa lightly strokes Eren through it, not enough to get him off, but enough to distract him, at least until i’m in to the hilt. Eren’s making these little noises and breathing heavily, and wow i can’t believe Mikasa is the loud one of the two of them, and he’s so tight and hot around me that I already feel like i’m on the brink of coming. “Wait, wait wait,” Eren’s voice is breathy and I clench his thighs, struggling to hold back, “let me turn over, I need to bite something, and it’s not going to be Mikasa.”

Begrudgingly, I pull out, and he flips over, curling his hands into the sheets. At first I was upset because I wouldn’t be able to see his face anymore, but oh, this is just as good. I can see the flushed tips of his ears, the planes of muscle across his back, and most importantly, his ass, which I didn’t get a good look at unclothed. Jesus, it’s a nice ass. Mikasa hands me the lube and I absentmindedly stroke it across myself. The sight of Eren spread out with his marvelous, round ass, and his twitching open hole, and his anticipating hip wiggles makes it so that I don’t remember to stop stroking myself and start doing something until Mikasa’s laugh snaps me out of it. 

I huff at that, but it’s cut off into a moan when I finally grind down into him, and realize that I can feel him shaking, holding himself back until I’m ready. I hold still inside him, waiting for him to adjust, and he huffs and shakes his ass, grinding his dick into the pillow under his hips, punching a loud “oooooh myy goooood” out of me when he backs up onto my dick again.

I pant and grab his hips, lifting them up so that they aren’t making contact with the bed anymore, but his head is still firmly buried in the pillow, muffled moans making their way to my ears. He’s not going to last long. I’m not going to last long. MIkasa makes her way over to us and lazily strokes Eren’s cock, hand shiny with lube. She smiles and kisses me, and I don’t have the concentration for finesse, I’m just pumping into Eren as hard and as fast as I can, listening to his loud moans, still muffled by the pillow. Mikasa is licking into my mouth and sucking on my tongue and Eren is clenching spastically around me and moaning loudly and god I think he just came, and I’m going to come so soon, I can feel it building inside me, tension coming to a peak. I hunch over him, and stop, grinding into him, practically sobbing at the release as I spill inside him. He whines loudly into the pillow and I can see his nearly soft cock twitching as I come in waves, deep inside him, still grinding with each wave, until I finally still, panting with exertion. I grin and pull out of him, rolling over so I’m laying between them.

Eren lets his hips fall to the bed and I can see a little bit of cum dripping out of him. I reach out and push it back in, my cock giving an interested twitch against my belly when that makes him moan. 

“I can’t believe that just happened,” I say, flopping back down next to them. 

“You just came in my ass,” Eren says, speaking in a monotone as he rolls over to look me in the eye, “you better start believing it quick so we can do that again.”

 

Mikasa laughs and snuggles into my side. “For now, lets just go to sleep. It’s been over an hour, and I’m still kinda hung over.”

I nod in agreement and pull Eren closer so he’s a part of the snuggling happening. Like that, happily settled between the two people I love the most in the world, I fall asleep while listening to their breathing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My fanfic tumblr is www.bucketosmuppets.tumblr.com visit me for whatever the hell people visit fanfic blogs for. Thanks for reading!!


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